You, With Me
by Art4Life1
Summary: If there was one thing Dabi hadn't expected to see today, it was Hawks upset.


**AN: A Dabihawks story because I've really gotten into this ship lately and I like exploring their relationship. This is, of course, assuming the Dabi is a Todoroki theory is true. **

**This was the first time I wrote them, but there will be more to come. Hope you enjoy!**

**\- Cover Art made by me**

* * *

If there was one thing Dabi hadn't expected to see today, it was Hawks upset.

He had slipped into the man's apartment not five minutes ago to find it eerily quiet. Most of the lights were off, and what little light there was came from the natural rays that shone through the window. When he hadn't found the hero around the first floor and he hadn't received a response, he had gone to the bedroom to see if his boyfriend (?) was asleep. As soon as he peered into the room, he knew that wasn't the case. Hawks was sitting, posture tense and curled forward, on the floor near the foot of his bed. His hero uniform had been set in a small pile a few feet away, and he now wore a simple t-shirt, and sweatpants. A small glass of what looked to be wine was held close in one hand, his golden-brown eyes not looking up from the floor.

Dabi was almost immediately at a loss. Hawks could get serious sometimes, but he rarely ever let others see him sad, or upset. He himself had only seen the hero's bravado falter once or twice. It may have had something to do with his hero image, but he didn't like to do it. Now, he didn't try to assure, or recapture his usual air of confidence. He didn't even look up as Dabi entered the room.

It was more concerning to him than he liked to admit.

"You deaf, bird brain? I was calling you down there."

Hawks shrugged, still not looking up. He drained his glass, face strained as he tried to swallow.

Dabi would have laughed if he didn't know it would be an insult to injury. A month ago, he would have. He would have jumped at the chance to see him this vulnerable - this low - and used every opportunity to take advantage of it. Now... he didn't want to do any of that. And if someone else had tried, he would have made sure they regretted it. "I thought you hated that stuff."

"Maybe so," he managed through a series of coughs, face contorted in distaste, resting the empty glass on the carpet.

They were both stubborn, but Dabi had had bad days around Hawks before. The man had given little hesitation, even at first, about trying to help him through them. Now, if he saw the villain looking, as he called, "grumpier than usual", he would immediately offer comfort. Sighing softly, Dabi moved to the entertainment center across from Hawks and sat in front of it. He wasn't as good at these things. There had been little in his life he could look to for examples of emotional comfort.

He was going to try anyway.

"What's got you so down that you're in here drinking?"

The tone was softer than before, but he couldn't completely shake the wryness from his tongue.

Hawks shrugged in return. His eyes flicked nervously towards Dabi at times, but for the most part remained glued to the floor, his hands, his lap. "It's... not something you need to worry about."

He wanted to protest, but there was something so hesitant and heavy about Hawks right now that he thought better of it. It felt like the hero was waiting for him to leave, and Dabi just wasn't going to do that. Not unless Hawks really wanted him to.

After a minute or so with no movement between them, Hawks spoke again. It was slow. Soft. "If... if you just came to have sex, I'm really not in the mood right now. Sorry to disappoint you."

The last bit was quietly sarcastic. The words felt a bit like a slap in the face, but he reigned in his frustration at the realization that Hawks was genuinely scared that that was the only reason he was here. That that was all there was between them. Dabi's lips curled into a small smirk and he huffed softly in amusement. "Bird brain..." he moved forward and curled a hand in Hawks' golden locks, making him look up. Different responses rattled around in his mind, but he settled on one. "I'm here to see you. Sex is nice. It's great with you, don't get me wrong, but it's not why I came over."

They had started out whatever their relationship was now with sex. It had been oddly nice, but it had rather quickly become something more than that. It had become something great, even if they were on different sides and would probably end up pinned against each other. Dabi repeated, "I came here to see you, not for a fuck."

The room was quiet. Hawks stared at him with wide, slightly wet eyes. The villain wondered for a moment if he had said the wrong thing, but Hawks took a shaky breath and muttered a genuine, "thank you." There was still a question in his eyes - a silent "do you mean it?" - but it was growing smaller.

Dabi gave him a small smile, surprisingly just as genuine. He wasted a moment thinking before he reached forward and pulled Hawks into his lap, careful of his wings. The man gave a surprised squawk but sat still once he was situated. The villain wrapped his arms around his torso and pulled him closer, allowing and even grateful when Hawks returned the embrace. It took a moment for them both to get comfortable, but once they were Hawks didn't hesitate to bury his head into Dabi's shoulder and curl his hands in his jacket.

His breaths shook more than before. Dabi brought a hand to the junction between his shoulder blades and rubbed around the area. It was sensitive and he made sure not to press too hard. His other hand rested on his lower back as a stabilizing force. Hawks shuddered in his arms. If Dabi listened hard enough he could swear he heard a sniff, though he slowly started to relax. It took a few minutes, but the man was soon almost completely lax again him.

"No fair," Hawks murmured, voice only a tickle against his chest. His tone was the lightest it had been, and it was a relief to hear.

"I don't think you want me to stop," Dabi countered.

There was a pause. The hero nuzzled closer. "No," he agreed warmly, "I don't."

Some of the same warmth bubbled in his chest, and he smiled a little more. "That's what I thought." He continued for a few minutes in relative quiet, glad for the contact, before he slowed. "If you want to tell me what's wrong, you can."

Hawks had never been one to willingly be quiet about things. He liked to talk about his day, weird villains or people he had taken down recently, food, other heroes... He made his opinions, thoughts, and feelings known. He pestered. Dabi often wished he would shut up, but now he really hoped if he was encouraged Hawks would let him know what was so clearly weighing him down.

The fact that Hawks was a hero trying to infiltrate the League, and Dabi a villain that should be trying to stop him didn't matter right now. They had crossed that bridge a while back, and what happened when they were together stayed there. It was a gray area where both of them could exist safely together.

There was a pause. Hawks' breath was warm against him. He swallowed thickly, and eventually nodded. "Okay, yeah... I guess I can." He was quiet for a moment, as if working himself up to say it. Maybe he was organizing his thoughts. "I... you know I work for the Hero Commission right?"

Dabi nodded, raising an eyebrow. "Doesn't every hero?"

"Kind of, yeah. We work with them frequently, sometimes indirectly. They help set up a lot of our operations with the police and work with how we should distribute news to the public."

"Mmn." Dabi hummed, making a disgruntled sound. They sounded like a lot of heroes he would hate.

To his surprise, Hawks nodded. "Yeah, they're..." he sighed. "Anyway, they... I work for them more than most heroes. They're the ones who gave me the job to infiltrate the League. They recruited me when I was really young, made me into the hero I am now, and I guess I kind of... owe them, or something." The unabashed bitterness in his voice was surprising. He laughed softly, though there was little humor to it, and cut himself off. "I won't go into that right now. Maybe later, if you still want to know, but..." He quieted.

Dabi let him think. He rubbed his thumb on his lower back, hoping it was reassuring.

Hawks took a deep breath. "Hero work can get really busy, especially if you're at the top. It can get lonely, and people usually have some kind of balance between their hero persona and their normal life. They have friends, they go out and do stuff after work, right? I... I don't really have that." His hands tightened their grip, his voice a little muffled into Dabi's shoulder. "I don't get a lot of choice in... in anything really. I do what I'm told for the betterment of others. I work as much, and as hard as I can, and I convince myself it's for the best. And it gets... today, it was too much."

He pulled back slowly from the villain's chest. His eyes didn't stray from Dabi's shirt, and his hands still curled into the fabric of his jacket, but Dabi could see his expression. It was pinched. Indecision, conflict, hurt... they were emotions he never would have associated with Hawks, but there they were. It was heartbreaking, and the tremor in his voice only added to it. "I get so lonely it _hurts_. I wonder if anything in my life is mine or if it's just something they've chosen for me. I wonder if- if what we have is real, because it's somehow the best thing that's happened in my fucking life and- and I-" His voice broke. He shook his head. "I don't know what to do. I'm- I feel like I'm imploding from all of it."

Hawks couldn't even raise his eyes, and Dabi was absolutely, one hundred percent unsure of what to do. It hurt him to see Hawks hurting like this. That was something he never thought would happen, and he had no idea how to fix any of it. But, looking down at him, he decided that that didn't matter. This was something he, in a sense, could relate to. When he had lived with his family, he often tried to help them with their problems. He snuck into Shouto's room to try to comfort him late in the night. He brought his mother bandages and an ice pack after she tried to intervene with training. He helped Fuyumi and Natsuo when they were lonely or dejected from how Endeavor treated them; when they were frustrated by everything that went on in that house. Though Fuyumi had grown more responsible with age, he often felt the need to be strong for them. This was kind of like that.

He rested a hand against the hero's cheek. Hawks' breathing had become uneven again, but Dabi was going to let it. "Pretty bird," he murmured, tone like the one he used to use when talking to his mother after a bad hit or Shouto after a particularly rough day of training. There was something else to it too, because Hawks was something new to him. Hawks was someone he cared for and he brought out things Dabi thought had been consumed in the flames that ate away at his skin, and the burning anger he felt towards the number two hero. "You don't have to be a hero right now. You can tell me whatever you need."

Hawks slowly raised his head. A few stray hairs fell in front of his face. A tear dripped against Dabi's palm, and he wiped it away with his thumb. He knew heroes had issues with showing vulnerability when in costume. When they were in their persona. They had to stay strong for those they were saving, and from what he knew now... Hawks was always saving. His cerulean eyes peered into his, and he assured, "You're just you. Just you, with me. Okay?"

The emotions played on Hawks' face in slow motion. Surprise transitioned into acceptance, which gave way to sadness and frustration and anger. More and more slipped in like pebbles creating larger and larger ripples in the water. The man bit his lip as it started to tremble and sniffed loudly. Dabi caught the new tears, and let Hawks wrap his arms around him once again.

It was his choice.

He settled into their previous position. One hand curled into the hero's blond hair. Hawks shook in his arms, gripping his jacket tightly. Dabi could feel tears start to drip into the fabric of his shirt, though Hawks was quiet for the most part. His wings would twitch occasionally when he heaved a particularly heavy breath, or a small sob broke through the barrier between them.

After several long minutes, Hawks began to calm. His breathing, though still shaky, slowed. His grip loosened. Dabi pulled closer and picked him up, standing with only a little wobble of his feet. The hero turned his head. "What are you..?"

Dabi shrugged, smiling wryly. "Your floor isn't the most comfortable in the world." He set Hawks on the bed, letting him adjust so his wings were in a comfortable position, and crawled over next to him. He wrapped his arms around the smaller man once again. The hero wasted only a second before he curled into his chest and returned the embrace. He soon relaxed completely, humming softly in approval.

"Yeah, you were right."

Dabi chuckled softly at that. "Can you repeat that? I didn't quite catch it."

Hawks' wing playfully hit the back of his head. It was only enough to ruffle his hair and let him feel a soft flick to his scalp. "You heard me, you overgrown heater."

His response was immediate, as natural as breathing. "You're just short, discount chicken."

The hero gave a small mock gasp, but it was ruined when he choked on laughter. His voice was a little rough from crying but filled with warmth. "Excuse you, I'm a fine chicken."

Dabi could hear the smile in his voice. "Debatable," he quipped, not bothering to bite back the smile in his own.

Hawks laughed again, softer this time, and nuzzled closer. His arm relaxed against the villain's back as he shuffled the topmost wing into another position. Quiet enveloped them, more comfortable than awkward. Dabi was hesitant to break it, but found himself asking after a minute, "You feeling a little better?"

"Yeah," Hawks replied softly, making no move to get up at all. Not that Dabi wanted him to. He paused before he turned his head, pulling back just enough to meet his eyes. "Nap sound okay to you?"

Warmth suddenly gripped at his chest. He gave a slight nod, admiring how the hero's eyes softened at the simple agreement. His hair was a little messy, more pieces than usual sticking up like stray feathers. A smile twitched at his lips a moment before he rested his head against Dabi's chest, muttering a quiet and heartfelt, "thank you".

Whether he was thankful Dabi staying, this uncharacteristic cuddling, or the opportunity at catch a cat nap he wasn't sure. Probably all the above. The quiet enveloped them again like a blanket. There was a low hum of activity outside, the bustle of cars and people commuting filling the space like white noise. As he shut his eyes and let it all wash over him, something inside him settled. Dabi realized dimly, as his consciousness faded from the comfort of Hawks' bed and the constant presence and sound of the man's even breathing against him, that he hadn't felt this at peace in a long time.


End file.
